MOVIES – MUSIC – TV – BOOKS
Moulin Rouge! (2001): Roxanne dance
Roxanne! This is the clash of all negative emotions performed through the incredibly perfect song Roxanne by The Police. A theatrical version that parallels the heartbreak and betrayal that is occurring.
It is an absolutely incredible scene. The best song on the soundtrack, the best dance in the movie, the best performance, the best lighting. Amazing.
Jodie.
Director: Quentin Tarantino
Writer: Quentin Tarantino
Released: December 2012/January 2013
Starring: Jamie Foxx, Christoph Waltz, Leonardo DiCaprio, Samuel L. Jackson
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Django.
The D is silent.
Well, I got to say, the first quarter of the movie is incredible! Django (Jamie Foxx) being freed by a strange man named Dr. King Schultz (Christoph Waltz) and the show-down that occurred between Schultz and the Speck Brothers who were transporting Django and other slaves to a plantation. This is where Django and Schultz become a team and continue the journey as Bounty Hunters (killing criminals and selling their corpses for rewards).
Dr. King Schultz: My good man, did you simply get carried away with your dramatic gesture, or are you pointing your weapon at me with lethal intention?
Ace Speck: [cocks shotgun] Last chance, fancy pants.
It was a fantastic start to another incredible Tarantino film… Or at least that’s what I thought… Let me tell you, the idea of “less is more” is not something that Tarantino agrees with.
It slowly (and boy do I mean slowly!) unravelled to reveal a story that consisted of long scenes of dialogue with very sudden outbursts of bloody gunfire that would last an eternity. Particularly the final fight.
Well you think it’s the final fight until another scene of dialogue and another fight follows. By the time it reaches the actual final gun fight, you’re so over the blood and gore that you’re immune to the tragedy of it all and the impact of the violent film has subsided.
If you’re worried that this film is going to be too sadistic… Don’t worry. It’s not. I’m not going to lie, I did flinch when a slave was ripped apart by dogs, and when a horse was shot in the head… But it is essentially a black comedy – it ain’t no Saw. It is seriously more comedic than violent, especially with the scene featuring Jonah Hill.
Christoph Waltz was absolutely hilarious too. Actually, this guy is going to get a whole paragraph dedicated to his acting. He is totally incredible! Did you know that he can speak three languages fluently!? English, French and German, which he speaks in Inglourious Basterds and Django Unchained. His way of acting is unlike any other… you can’t even tell if he is acting or not because he is just so natural. *Sigh*. Maaaan… He needs a hi-5. His character had some wicked quotes too.
You silver-tongued devil, you.
Unfortunately, some things were unintentionally funny. Like Quentin Tarantino’s cameo… Yeah. That was… Weird. Especially since him and another character were speaking with an Australian accent. That literally came out of nowhere, so confusing! It was kind of disturbing.
I have to make a quick point about the horses. They were SO well trained! Incredible stunt horses. Being a horserider myself, I tend to get really picky about how the horses or riders are doing something wrong, like if the horse-doubles look very little alike or how the actors can’t ride or how sometimes I notice that one of the riders is totally out of control of their horse.
But I couldn’t fault any of the horses or riders in this film! Particularly Jamie Foxx when he was riding a horse with no bridle or saddle… Actually that was yet another left-field occurrence. It was kind of pointless, unexpected and weird.
I had read somewhere before seeing Django Unchained that there is a part where Leonardo accidentally slams his hand down onto a wine glass while in character. I looked out for it, and it makes the scene a hundred times better because for a split second you see the shock on his face, but he carries on. Throughout the scene he picks glass out of his hand, even smearing his own blood over another actor’s face. Awesomely grotesque, I have got to say! Good on you, DiCaprio. He played an mildly insane and overpowering man very well!
Gentlemen, you had my curiosity, now you have my attention.
The music was pretty cool. My favourite song was one called Freedom by Anthony Hamilton and Elayna Boynton. But out of nowhere a hardcore rap song blared against while a group of horses and riders walked from one end of the screen to the other… The mood of the movie was sort of ruined by odd little choices like that.
It wasn’t as sadistic or gory as I was expecting it to be. Also, the story line did not involve as many personal details about many characters, like there was in Inglourious Basterds. It made the entire movie seem distant, making it difficult to lose yourself in the movie.
I reckon Quentin Tarantino was just having fun in this movie. I reckon it would have been much more entertaining being on set every day rather than sitting through a Lord of the Rings-length Western/Black Comedy/Romance/Action movie.
Still confused by what I just watched…
Jodie’s rating: 6/10
You need to watch this trailer to listen purely to Christoph’s voice! His use of inflection is perfection!
Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows (2011): Running through the forest
This is where the characters are running in slow motion while being shot at. It captures every tiny detail and the sheer panic. Throw in some Inception music and you got the most epic scene in the whole shebang.
Jodie.
Directed: Nigel Cole
Written: William Ivory
Released: October 2010
Featuring: Sally Hawkins, Rosamund Pike, Miranda Richardson, Bob Hoskins, Geraldine James
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This movie is based in the late sixties during a time when women were treated unequally in the work place. They were degraded and given less pay than the men, simply because they are women.
The leader of the movement Rita O’Grady, played by Sally Hawkins, a worker in a Ford factory in Dagenham, organises the rallies. Based on a true story, these women made history in their success in getting equality in the workplace – even meeting Barbara Castle (Miranda Richardson)!
Rita carries the guilt of others’ personal issues such as dealing with the after effects of war on her friends as well as keeping everybody united in the struggle against the workplace. This adds another very human dimension to the film.
Rights not privileges, it’s really that simple.
My favourite character is by far Lisa, played by Rosamund Pike. She is beautifully elegant, and posesses a fantastically strong sense of right and wrong. Her opinion is generally unwelcome, but I just adore everybody’s faces when she speaks out A look of utter shock. She is strong, intelligent and an amazing woman.
I’m Lisa Burnett, I’m 31 years old and I have a first class honours degree from one of the finest universities in the world, and my husband treats me like I’m a fool…
It’s based in the sixties, so naturally the music and fashion is absolutely to die for! The dresses, the hair, the dancing *gasp* …so amazing.
This is a movie that will inspire and move you. It is entertaining and funny with an amazing cast! This is not a preachy feminist film either. This is based on true circumstances adding so much integrity to the script.
The front cover of the DVD and poster is very inaccurate. It looks like it is a happy-go-lucky rom-com. It is far from it. It is a drama based on humanity and personal triumphs.
An incredible journey by heroines based in a time of total change.
Jodie’s rating: 8/10
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows 1 (2010): Hermione & Harry dancing
In this scene, Hermione and Harry dance to a very emotive song called O’ Children by Nick Cave and the Black Seeds as they mourn Ron’s absence and the bitter situation that they have found themselves in during the war and the search for Voldemort’s horcruxes. It seems to be the quiet time before the storm, but after much destruction, loss and heartache.
Jodie.
The Pianist (2002): Playing piano for a soldier
In this scene, a German Soldier, Captain Wilm Hosenfeld (Thomas Kretschmann), discovers Władysław Szpilman’s (Adrian Brody) hiding place. Instead of killing him, he helps him survive.
But before leaving after their first encounter, the German Soldier asks what he will do after the war is over. “Play the piano again” he answers. “Show me” the German soldier replies.
After two years of not being able to do the one thing he loves, Władysław does so, happily. He looks like he is healing himself after the battle to survive the war, which is slowly coming to an end.
I think this scene intrigues me because I believe the soldier just wanted the hurt of the war to end. After watching the whole film showing the destruction German Soldiers brought, he makes us remember that they are only human too. He seems to be thinking about the actions of his soldiers, what is right or wrong, perhaps his loss of faith in fighting… Music can provoke many feelings.
Wilm Hosenfeld did in fact make a habit of helping Jewish people survive in labour camps, before dying in a POW camp himself, possibly after being tortured.
I think, in this scene, both parties are united by music; healing together and making peace.
Jodie.
What do you think of when somebody mentions Bridget Jones?
“A verbally-incontinent tragic spinster who smokes like a chimney and drinks like a fish?”
Yes, although a somewhat blunt description of the Bridget Jones’ character, I do feel like that she is also a role model. She represents a group of women in their thirties with a career but no partner, with bad habits and frequent input in their love life from “vulgar mothers”.
Suddenly I realised that I was going to live a life where my major relationship was with a bottle of wine…
Sure, I can’t really relate to Bridget’s generation or situation… Yet. But like many young women, struggling to succeed in life, Bridget Jones acts as a role model. Particularly when making the right decisions in relationships, in Bridget’s case, between tempting (Daniel Cleaver) and sensible (Mark Darcy) choices.
“[I like you] just as you are”? Not thinner? Not cleverer? Not with slightly bigger breasts or a slightly smalls nose?
-Bridget’s friends discussing Mark Darcy’s comment.
If anything, watching/reading Bridget Jones’ Diary makes you feel better about making a total arse of yourself in public. It’s sort of comforting in a weird way knowing that a lovable and fun character also does stupid things and everything still tends to work out fine her anyway.
…you seem to go out of your way to try to make me feel like a complete idiot… and you really needn’t bother. I already feel like an idiot most of the time anyway.
The film adaptations were convincingly played by American Renee Zellweger whose English accent was flawless. The dreamy Colin Firth played Mark Darcy, and quite appropriately, the stuck-up and smug Daniel Cleaver was effortlessly portrayed by Hugh Grant.
A down to earth, bog standard, nothing-special woman who makes every painfully average woman feel a little better about themselves. It’s okay to be ordinary, clumsy, chubby and single, thanks to Bridget.
Jodie.
Hey guys!
I love music as well as movies, so I would like to share a site that I have discovered with you.
The Pleasure Dome offers a convincing throw back to the 1980s era. Great ’80s hits played in the format of a radio show that you can listen to in the background while working.
Check it out at: thepleasuredome.co
And their Facebook Page.
Where it’s summer all year long!
Hope you enjoy it!
Jodie.
So I love this song so much that I made a music video for it.
I hope you enjoy it! I wanted to match the moody and drone of the music. It’s an incredible song, so I hope I gave it justice.
Enjoy!
My Music Video:
Jodie.
Director: Lasse Hallström
Writer: Screenplay by Robert Nelson Jacobs. Based on the novel by Joanne Harris.
Released: December 2000
Starring: Judi Dench, Johnny Depp and Carrie-Anne Mos
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A mysterious and magical fable-like tale about an eccentric, colourful and embracing 
chocolatier named Vianne Rocher (Juliette Binoche) and how she brightened up a deeply rooted traditional French village. Her provocative clothing, illegitimate child and outspoken values made her unwanted in the village, being outcast as an evil influence. Despite this, her Chocolaterie brings hope and perspective to the guilty customers. Amongst this, there is a compelling love interest between Vianne and a free-spirited Irish traveller, Roux (Johnny Depp).
I love the lead actress, Juliette Binoche, but I do wonder if they chose her because Marion Cotillard was unavailable. In any case, they are two gorgeously elegant and talented French women.
This film is about depriving ourselves of things purely for the discipline, particularly pressured by religion or the expectations of society. With everybody being up tight about keeping a perfect front for others, it seems easy for the important things in their lives to crumble in the background. Perhaps marriage, not pursuing new love, staying in dangerous situations from fear of persecution, or not allowing themselves to try new things.
The Chocolaterie represents freedom and indulgence. It is a moral that allows people to make mistakes, to not feel guilty about taking pleasure in something or feeling damned or frowned upon. They begin to give into desires, discover new feelings and acting on them.
The soundtrack is authentically French! Minor Swing by Django Reinhardt/Stéphane Grappelli makes you want to get up and dance, with other classical songs that bring out the essence of the town. Lots of guitars and drums that gets your feet tapping. Fantastic songs.
This is a movie set in the year of 1959. The women wear dresses and hats and the men in suits. Everything seems black and white until the woman with pink shoes and bright coloured dresses arrives. The costumes are absolutely to die for. The shoes, the belts the make up… So beautiful!
I have to say, the first few times I watched this, I was expecting it to be a bit more mystical with a Chocolatier who is very wise and knowledgeable, helping people in every place that she moves to. 
But she is only human who makes mistakes and questions life like the people in the village opened themselves up to do. Now that I’m older, I can see that this was purposeful. Vianne is flawed too which just makes this fable a much more down to earth film.
For all the chocolate lovers, Johnny Depp lovers, romantics, dreamers and free thinkers. This is a personable film that is easy to watch and brings hope to people, particularly to anyone who feels a little different or who questions society’s morals, or the things that we are influenced by.
An uplifting, soulful journey of how a little sweetness in life can bring people together.
Jodie’s rating: 8/10
Director: Christopher Nolan
Writer: Jonathan Nolan and Christopher Nolan
Released: October 2006
Featuring: Hugh Jackman, Christian Bale, Michael Caine, Scarlett Johansson and David Bowie
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David Bowie is in it… I don’t think anything more really needs to be said…
Act one: “The Pledge”
Are you watching closely?
The Prestige is an incredible movie with real mystery and thrilling themes, like nothing you have ever seen before. Its dark and haunting aesthetic with the ruthless, deceitful, cut-throat and competitive characters makes an extremely intense film.
It is the story of strong-willed magicians who guard their incredible tricks of illusions with their lives resulting in sacrifices way beyond their expectations 
as their hunger for dominance of rival magicians runs riot.
Of course, I can’t forget to mention the era that this movie is set in, the late 1800s. I wouldn’t mind living in those times… Only if I was very wealthy of course. Beautiful dresses, old school showmanship, horse and carts and the thrill of newly discovered electricity.
With the complexity of Nolan’s Inception, the grungy look of The Dark Knight, but with a hint of total tragedy, this is just another of Christopher’s incredible creations.
Act Two: “The Turn”
I’m sure it will be compared to The Illusionist… But that doesn’t come anywhere near to what The Prestige delivers, nor does it deliver as much mystery, heart-break or violence. The Prestige is truly a one of a kind movie that makes you feel scared, desperate, amazed and sit mesmerised at the end trying to figure out the wild twists and turns in the story.
The trailer for The Illusionist, a second class film in comparison, but a pretty decent film nonetheless.
This film makes you gasp, cry, feel a sense of desperation and total awe as Hugh Jackman and Christian Bale’s characters go to extreme lengths, bending moral judgment to the expense of their loved ones, as they attempt to steal each other’s secrets of their most breath-taking, and threatening, tricks.
With such unexpected twists and turns, it is impossible to guess the ending. Unfortunately, knowing the ending can spoil the magic of the film for future viewing, sort of like in the second or third viewing of The Others.
Act Three: “The Prestige”
There really is no thrill in knowing the secret behind the magic. “The secret impresses no one”.
So incredible.
Jodie’s rating: 9/10
Recently stumbled across this song via a fellow follower, Dusty who was promoting his top ten songs of 2012.
I had never heard of this act or song before but I knew within ten seconds that I loved it. It’s moody and full of emotion with dark lyrics that tell a vivid story.
Jesus Christ, girl
What are people gonna think
When I show up to one of several funerals
I’ve attended for grandpa this week
With you
With meSomeone’s got to help me dig
It has a strong, steady beat with a metallic sounding guitar complemented with echoed vocals that drones which is actually very relaxing.
Alternative rock/indie genre is my favourite, with this band’s sound reminding me of a darker, rockier Cold War Kids.
An awesome discovery.
Jodie.
Not only do I adore this movie and Ellen Page, but I think the character is the bee’s knees.
Juno is a typical bored suburban teenager who gets into a spot of bother with her best friend, Bleeker, a stringy-looking track runner who gets Juno pregnant… Or how she says “I’m for shizz up the spout”
Despite the tragic circumstances of the sixteen year old, she is so up beat and totally hilarious with her choice of language.
“Quiet, Banana. Hey, shut your gob, okay” (to the barking dog)
“Silencio old man! I just drank my weight in Sunny D. and I have to go, pronto.”
“I’m already pregnant, what other shenanigans could I get into?”
“I thought I might, you know, nip it in the bud before it gets worse. Because I heard in health class that pregnancy often results in an infant.”
A
nd many more genus lines – obviously thanks to the brains behind this character, Diablo Cody.
I love Juno because of her confidence, her boyish style and sense of humour in everything, even when “dealing with stuff way beyond [her] maturity level”. It is literally impossible not to respond to people without Juno’s sarcasm after watching this movie.
She is inspirational because makes every bad thing seem like it’s no big deal.
And if anybody knows where to get brown tartan Chucks, let me know. They look wicked.
Jodie.
Director: Tate Taylor
Writer: Tate Taylor (screenplay), Kathryn Stockett (novel)
Released: August 2011
Starring: Emma Stone, Octavia Spencer, Viola Davis, Bryce Dallas Howard
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The first thing that attracted me to this DVD was, quite shallowly, the dresses that the characters were wearing on the cover. This was a story based in the sixties, also, it has Emma Stone in it.
So I decided to [wait until the price came down and] buy it.
In the back of my mind I was expecting it to be either over-emotional and depressing such as the film Precious (which I still haven’t brought myself to watch). Or, I was expecting it to be a little too cheesy… But I was gladly wrong.
This is a story about a strong-willed and moral young woman named Skeeter (Emma Stone) who interviewed African-American maids in Jackson, Mississippi despite it being very dangerous and very much against the law.
With many struggles and an immense amount of courage from all involved, she wrote a book anonymously based upon the accounts of the Help who serve white families for little money and humiliating conditions.
Although I am not overly well-versed in American Civil Rights history, it is not hard to feel sympathetic and emotionally moved by the stories of the Help, or incredible remorse for the way that many of the white population viewed African-American people.
Hilly Holbrook (Bryce Dallas Howard) plays the ‘villain’. It’s easier to pity her more than despise her, and she is still accessible enough to guess why she acts the way she does.
Skeeter was the most inspirational character of course. Maybe because she is about my age. But I also find her an inspirational character because she refuses to fit into society.
She doesn’t just want to get married, live in a house in the suburbs or pay a maid to raise her children. Instead, she wanted to change the world around her for the better. Skeeter graduated as a journalist and bravely took on a huge project for the greater good, giving the ignored maids a voice.
Minny (right) and her new employer, Celia (Jessica Chastain) is a happy go-lucky woman who is impossible to dislike. She is excluded from the white community, probably because of her acceptance of everybody – no matter the colour – and finds friendship in her new maid, Minny Jackson.
I am reluctant to give too much credit to the author that this film was based on, Kathryn Stockett, because I’m not incredibly sure she was completely honest and pure in her intentions (my theory based upon a few interviews I have seen her in).
There was a lawsuit filed against her by Aibileen, the author’s brother’s maid, saying that Stockett had stolen her life story without her knowledge. Although Stockett was found innocent, it did take the honour out of the story a bit.
The novel is in fact fiction, with bits and pieces drawn from Stockett’s life experiences as a white child growing up in the South with a family maid. But, it is essentially a story that is worth being told to remind us of how it was, with themes of friendship, adversity, desperation and success.
This film is a people film. It follows characters who have flaws and struggles, triumphs and strength. It follows the lives of various people and from their points of view which reminds me of The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, Big Fish and other stories that accurately follow the path of interesting, yet believable, people.
Triumphant and inspirational.
…Also, their accents and way of talking is so awesome. I’ve watched this movie so many times, my thoughts are now in a Southern accent.
Jodie’s rating: 8/10
Can’t say that the movie is quite as upbeat as this trailer makes it out to be, but it gives you chills nevertheless.
Director: Ruben Fleischer
Writer: Will Beall (screenplay),Paul Lieberman (novel)
Released: January 2013
Starring: Ryan Gosling, Emma Stone and Sean Penn
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Wow! I was so looking forward to seeing this and boy was it worth the wait!
It certainly reminded me of Public Enemies (featuring Johnny Depp) for obvious reasons; both based on a true story, both take place in the forties involving Los Angeles gangsters. However, the stories are clearly different.
Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling reunite again since Crazy, Stupid, Love. Both of them are fantastic together once again. Two of my favourite actors, for sure!
A very appropriate choice of lighting (or lack of) on the director’s behalf which made the feel of the movie accurate. It was rough and dangerous, yet still attractive. I am sure that the amount of people who smoked in that era was not exaggerated in the movie, too. Every interior scene was smoky, which was not only historically accurate but very artistic as it diffused the harsh lighting within the dim rooms.
I remember mentioning that I thought that there was not enough car chases in the incredible forties vehicles in Public Enemies… Well, it is safe to say that there are plenty in this movie. At least 60% of the movie are car chases or gun fights.
Unfortunately, I have to mention that the gun fights began to go on for a bit too long within some parts, stopping and starting all over the place with very few people ever getting hit by bullets. Perhaps taking the attention away from the more personal stories that could have been developed further, meaning that attachment to the characters was not quite as possible as they could have been. I think to make the gun fights more attention grabbing, some more slow motion action would have been effective.
Overall, a very exciting film set in one of my favourite time periods. A time with incredible fashion, immaculate cars and terrifyingly powerful gangsters.
Loved the wicked fists fights and sadistic criminals!
Jodie’s Rating: 7/10
Okay, I stumbled across this incredible mash up in the Narnia parts of YouTube. I think it is so incredibly well made. Two very unlikely songs, two opposite genres from two different time periods. Eminem’s Lose Yourself mashed with Elvis Presley’s Jailhouse Rock.
It is easy listening at it’s best. Fantastic. I’ve always been big fans of both artists, and this just shows how their different styles can compliment each other.
Enjoy!
Jodie.
Directed: Rich Moore
Written: Rich Moore, Phil Johnston and Jim Reardon
Released: November 2012
Starring: John C. Reilly, Jane Lynch and Sarah Silverman
—
Not knowing that this animation was in fact aimed at a younger audience, I was rather disappointed/bored. I know what you’re thinking, of course it’s a childish movie – it’s animation about video games.
But let me draw your attention to the likes for Ice Age (the first one), Toy Story (1, 2 and 3) and Brave. Wreck-It Ralph was in no way on par with the likes of these animated features.
Wreck-It Ralph is a ‘bad guy’ in a standard arcade machine, always out-shined by the Ned Flanders-like figure, Fix-It Felix. Ralph does not want to be the demonised figure and escapes into an arcade machine adjacent to his to win a medal and feel the sense of reward that Felix gets. But, if Ralph is killed in a game that is not his own, he will not get another life and it’s game over forever.
However, I must say, this setting has not really been done before. The mixture of nostalgic arcade games (for the parents) and the fun, colourful and exciting characters to appeal to the kids, this moral-drenched story is a fine cartoon for the holidays.
Very clever graphics that keep it ‘accurate’, such as the much more basic games having very basic graphics.
I thought it was quite a long movie which would be a draw back for children… Especially being in a cinema where we were surrounded by children, trust me, they let you know a movie is too long after about an hour…
So, Wreck-It Ralph was not quite what I expected, the target audience was not that clear, perhaps. But I can appreciate it nevertheless.
Perfect for the school holidays. A “high score” for many children and some older people too, I’m sure. A bearable film for parents.
Jodie’s rating: 5/10
As you may have noticed, the world is not at its end. You may be pondering why this may have not occurred. Here are some of my suggestions…
1. After time travelling back to the beginning of the Mayan calendar, Doctor Who attempted to speak to the Mayan elders to extend the end of the calendar to a much further date in time. He was unsuccessful and was accused of being a witch doctor. He tried to explain that he wasn’t a Doctor Which, but a Doctor Who. After convincing them to not treat him as a threat, he was able to compromise, and settled on an agreement. That at the end of the Mayan calendar a “to be cont.” sign was to be etched at the end. Scientists, if they were to re-study the Mayan calendar today, will find this statement, thanks to the Doctor.
2. A huge meteor was hurtling toward Earth, NASA people were freaking out (despite the many press releases stating otherwise). They called the man that is never to be spoken about publicly. His name, is Superman. Fiction? I think not! Unfortunately, the meteor was purposely laced with kryptonite by the alien beings who wanted to ruin Superman’s world. He was unable to stop the meteor in it’s path, so Iron Man, although a little drunk from his house party celebrating his updated Iron Man suit, was able to use his brain, his mind and his head too, making it possible with the use of various lasers and alcohol-induced decisions to divert the meteor. Phewph!
3. Having heard about the Mayans’ little plan about ending the Earth in 2012, Vianne, a girl who lived around the time of the invention of the Mayan calendar, decided that she had to do something. She was never welcome in the Mayan society because of her super powers that were shunned by the elders who never acknowledged her existence (which is why she can not be found in any Mayan history).
Vianne climbed up to the tallest tree on the tallest mountain and leapt! She flew higher and higher, through the clouds and out into space. She then flew around the earth millions of times a second like a string being wound up into a ball. She was able to fly so fast that the atmosphere began to be disturbed and a protective film or layer was created.
A layer that we now call an ozone that protected Earth from the meteorite that was supposed to impoverish the Earth in December of 2012. Our ozone layer protects us against many things that would have damaged the world in Mayan times due to the world’s lack of ozone.
4. Ever heard of the butterfly effect? Where the tiniest of changes made by the likes of a time traveller, perhaps the indiscriminate killing of a minuscule insect could change the future forever through a domino effect. Well, in fact, what actually happened to prevent the world from being wiped from existence in 2012 was a time traveller who travelled from the year 1750AD, back in time to the year 3114 BC.
Stepping out of his time machine that looked like a bowling ball, the time traveller realised that he forgot to install a hand break, and even worse than that, he had landed on a hill. Just as he opened the door, the time machine began to roll at an alarming rate toward a river.
Airborne, the machine continued falling down the gully and landed on the fast flowing river, landing with an unsatisfying splash like a ping-pong ball thrown into a swimming pool. Now, I know what you’re thinking, you think I’m going to say that on the way down the hill the time machine squished something that had major repercussions on the distant future…
Although during it’s time travelling voyage, it’s technological outputs misguided many migrating Monarch butterflies. The Monarch butterflies used to migrate annually to southern Mexico from Canada for the fall, however, since the day that their migrating instincts were interfered with, they now fly to central Mexico, which is their annual habit even today…
But apart from that, in fact what happened was that as the spheric time machine rolled down the hill that was classed as “sacred” by the local native Mayan people of Southern Mexico. This was witnessed by a Mayan woman who had been put in charge of creating the Mayan Calendar. She had a rock canvas that was a rectangular shape and had begun carving the dates when suddenly a giant ball-like rock thing appeared in the distance and rolled down the sacred hill at an ever increasing speed, demolishing trees on the way.
Mesmerised by this sight, she realised that a rectangular canvas would not be inspirational or aesthetically pleasing enough, and a round rock would be required. Unfortunately, a round rock could not accommodate nearly as many dates, hence why she ran out of room by the time she got to the year 2012 rather that the previous date of 20012. Oops!
Thanks 9gag.com
Let me know what your reasons are for the lack of a 2012 apocalypse.
Jodie.
Today may or may not be the end of the world.
If it is, I am predicting a zombie apocalypse, and armed with my knowledge of zombie movies, I shall guide you to survival with my top tips!
Of course, depending on what zombie movie we are studying, depends on what actions will be required. Because the Shaun of the Dead lazy and stupid zombies need to be treated completely differently to the manic sprinters that are in Dawn of the Dead, Land of the Dead and Zombieland, or the vampire-like zombies in I Am Legend who have wild dog side-kicks, meaning that animals are vulnerable to the infections too!
Now, if you wanted rules specifically for the Zombieland kind of zombies, clearly all you have to do is watch that movie and take down all of the rules that Jesse Eisenberg’s character has in order to survive.
But here are mine:
1. Find strong back up. Of course your friends and family will be you priority, but if you’re going at this alone keep in mind that skills are what will keep you alive.
Look out for fit people with weapons or survival skills. Army dudes and people with medical training can only help.
If all else fails, find yourself a gamer. They’re in huge supply, they have quick reflexes, are stealthy, competitive and know [the theory of] handling weapons. Their body clocks are usually out of whack too, so they will happily be on watch duty at night.
2. Keep moving! As soon as you decide to hunker down you’ll be sitting ducks and that’s when you have more chance of being bored which may cause you to make more noise, therefore, attracting more attention to yourselves. Being bored increases the danger of turning on your fellow companions, or at least going a little bit mad. Plus, if you stay in one place the zombies will sniff you out anyway.
3. Get armed! Knives and blunt objects, but guns will be the best option. Think of who might have weapons and team up/steal them (the weapons, not the owner of them).
If you ever get into a sticky situation, you need to know that you can protect yourself against a zombie killing machine. Aim for the head.
4. Most zombies do not possess a great natural ability to climb. So stay high! Keep above ground by climbing trees if in a rural setting, or using rooves in a suburban setting. Under ground can only be an option if it is super secure, not just a basement like in Shaun of the Dead because they will find you, and not many basements have more than one exit. At least two is essential!
5. With this huge lifestyle change, you can’t forget the basics! Keep clean, stay hydrated, get rest and stay healthy. If you have food available, still check the expiry dates! Milk past its use by date is not good for anyone, zombie apocalypse or not.
6. Have a goal. For most people getting to a safe house they heard of is what drives them, or finding the cure or getting a way better vehicle than they already have. For some, it is to get from ‘anywhere but here’/find a rescue team of some kind, and for others it is to find Twinkie bars… In any case, having a purpose is the simplest way to keep alive AND to stay sane!
7. Drive. Staying on foot means much less protection from a zombie attack. Of course, keep in mind fuel is actually necessary to keep a car going. Make sure fuel is always available by staying in deserted suburbia near the petrol stations or even better, keeping cans of petrol in the car with you.
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1. DON’T: provoke zombies. After becoming acclimatised to your situation, you may become bored without your technology – iPods, laptops, mobile phones etcetera (since electricity most likely would have been shut off, and in any case, many people would not have time to check Facebook/are dead). But use your excess time wisely, grow vegetables, find a library and get some survival books. But do not use zombies as your source of entertainment! This could be fatal. You are no longer on the top of the food chain, people!
DON’T hesitate about stealing stuff. Never been rebellious before? Don’t worry! If you need food but there is no supermarket check out assistant, it is now acceptable to steal! Need to get some new clothes? Break into the nearest vacant house (with caution) and take them – just do it! No need to knock either. Just kick the door down – even if it is unlocked! When confronted by zombies, witty comments are always desirable before killing them/running away. You have to be a badass now. You need to be a ruthless killer. Start acting like it!
3. DON’T think like a zombie. That’s the quickest way to finding yourself as a zombie. It didn’t work for Bill Murray in Zombieland, and it only worked for the people in Shaun of the Dead because their zombies were stupid. Also because they were in a comedy. YOU ARE NOT IN A COMEDY. You are in a horror – think that way. Even in small ways, if you hear something down stairs – don’t go down to check it out! Jump out the window and run! Haven’t seen Scream? Maybe you should! Brush up on your horror movie rules before becoming a part of an apocalypse.
4. DON’T be deceived by safety in numbers. You reckon you’ll be safe in the city? Think again! The more people you’re surrounded by, the quicker you’ll become surrounded by a crap load of zombies! Disease spreads rapidly in crowded areas, so don’t be a sheep, get moving!
Good luck guys! Those are just a few pearls of wisdom from me, I’m sure you have many more, so feel free to share them in a comment or on my NZ Film Freak Facebook page… While you still can!
Happy 21st of December to you! :)
Jodie.
Writers: Jeremy Leven and Jan Sardi. Based on The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks
Director: Nick Cassavetes
Released: 2004
Starring: Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams
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If you haven’t watched this movie, it is basically about a wealthy girl, Allison (Rachel McAdams), who fell in love with a poor country boy, Noah (Ryan Gosling), whom her parents did not approve of. She was taken away and after a few years was engaged to marry a more ‘appropriate’ man of wealth and status.
That is until Noah comes back into the picture which forces Allison to choose between a respectable, kind young wealthy man or a free spirited, kind young poor man.
As I have mentioned many times in previous posts, romance is not my cup of tea. I don’t enjoy the predictability of them, the smooching, the overly-perfect and much-too-good-looking characters, as well as the either typically happily ever after or tragic endings.
OR the mamsy-pamsy emotional blubbering characters who through the fog of their infatuation are unable to reach logical decisions.
For example, when Noah writes to Allie every day for 365 days after she leaves (he could have just said ‘one year’, but he kept having to make a point of saying “365 days” – for effect I suppose).
Surely, after two weeks maximum, he would have rung her, visited her or at least double checked the address. I. Mean. Seriously! You silly love drunk people…
The Notebook is no exception to my lack of support for the romance genre.
Although I do think that Rachel McAdams is what many women want to look like, and Ryan Gosling is the pin-up boy for Hollywood’s ideal.
He’s not me though; apparently he waxes his whole body on a regular basis because he doesn’t like body hair. Also, he’s too muscley, like, to the point where he looks uncomfortable to hug. Like a rock would be.
I know what you’re thinking; “but Jodie, you gave Moulin Rouge! – the most romantic film – 9.5/10. Isn’t that hypocritical?”
Well, no, because Moulin Rouge! has integrity making it more believable with various other themes other than love. Plus, its whole basis of ‘the denial of true love’ is ironic since the Bohemian era that it was based in promoted that very thing!
The Notebook and Moulin Rouge! are two very different story lines that are portrayed completely differently with various depths and convincing content. Although their genres overlap, they are apples and oranges.
The Notebook is a Nicholas Sparks story, who has written romance novels including Dear John and The Lucky One. I am lead to believe they all strive to follow very similar story lines with similar characters.
Admittedly, for a romance genre it is a tasteful portrayal of the characters falling in love – it’s no 50 Shade of Grey! It’s more intimate than a chick flick but still tame enough for most people to enjoy.
I can definitely agree that the era that The Notebook was set in was pretty awesome. It was based in the 1940s so the dresses, shoes and hair-dos were rather spectacular! I love all of Allie’s wardrobe for sure.
The sets are beautiful, from the house referred to as the “Labour of Love”, to the incredible dream-like lake. The town looks like it is straight out of the forties too.
However, the ridiculously short war scene let the authenticity down. The director obviously forgot to take down notes from the shocking war film Saving Private Ryan. But I guess romance films don’t like having accurate fighting scenes as it may loose their audience who want to be taken away to a land of perfection.
I like having to think about story lines and The Notebook is two dimensional and too simple/predictable – almost cringe-worthy at times.
But, if you love romance, I’m sure you’ll love The Notebook too. It plays out very idealistic love interests with people who are certainly easy on the eye.
Jodie’s rating: 5/10
Director: Randal Kleiser
Writers: (Screenplay) Bronte Woodard and Allan Carr based on Grease by Jim Jacobs Warren Casey
Released: 1978
Starring: Olivia Newton-John and John Travolta
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I have never really been a fan of musicals, but Grease is certainly an exception and an all time favourite of mine.
Musical or not, its fifties costumes and authentic hair-dos are enough to make me love this optimistic film. I love this era and it’s portrayed in the most idyllic light. Obviously Grease is essentially a stage play which isn’t lost in the movie form with the occasional fourth wall barriers lost.
Based in a high school environment, the seventeen and eighteen year old characters were almost unconvincingly played by actors in their late twenties and early thirties. But the whole shebang is so up-beat, colourful and exciting that you forget that the ages are totally wrong.
It’s a great musical because it is full of colour and lovable characters, who although are stereotyped, are easily relatable. Especially the Pink Ladies, but perhaps the T Birds were not explored individually quite as much.
Unfortunately each of the Pink Ladies has quite a negative moral to them.
Sandy (Olivia Newton-John): You need to change and fit in to be noticed and respected.
Rizzo (Stockard Channing): Sleeping around gets you attention. Getting pregnant is a risk, but hopefully that won’t occur, and celebrations are in order whenever she realises she isn’t pregnant. Don’t bother learning your lesson.
Frenchy (Didi Conn): A little bit ditzy and attempted to break away from the crowd and do something different. However, this was too hard and frowned upon by others, it is best to stick with the crowd.
Marty (Dinah Manoff): A little arrogant and an attention seeker who is very much into her looks. Her cold dispostion is attractive to men.
Jan (Jamie Donnelly): The unattractive ‘fat’ one. Except, she’s tiny and clearly on the lower end of the average weight scale. Staying super skinny is attractive and eating in general is clearly frowned upon.
Looking deeper into Grease, it is clear that the morals are not to be desired. Not moving forward or being different is certainly a bad thing. But, Grease is supposed to be quite a two dimensional film that is simple and entertaining. Stereotypes and happy endings make feel-good movies, which this certainly is.
John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John are two great actors and singers for sure! But have you heard their reunion song!? It is so sad! They should be so proud of their accomplishments in Grease, but let’s leave it in the seventies, guys.
If you want to cringe and ruin your ideals of the two protagonists of the famous musical, feel free to watch their 2012 song:
I don’t like Travolta at the best of times – his hair looks like it’s painted on and his eyes are too blue. But this is just toe-curlingly bad!
The soundtrack has many lovely sing-a-long songs with my favourites being the comedic Look At Me, I’m Sandra Dee sung by Stockard Channing (Rizzo) and We Are Together. But my above-all favourite song is Blue Moon, I’m not sure who did this version, but it is certainly my favourite (*gasp!* even better than Elvis Presley’s!).
It is a very fun, very uplifting movie that isn’t supposed to be read into too much. It was popular when it was first released in the seventies and it will continue to be extremely popular throughout future generations, I’m sure.
Jodie’s rating: 7/10
Director: Tim Burton
Writer: Caroline Thompson and Tim Burton
Released: 1990
Starring: Johnny Depp, Winona Ryder and Dianne Wiest
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You’ll either love it or hate it. I happen to love it.
Tim Burton’s quirky and off centre idea of normalcy is shown in Edward Scissorhands which is about a man who was created by an inventor who died before he could complete him – hence the scissors for hands. Edward finds himself embraced into suburbia which challenges the belief system of the small, gossipy population, before everything goes wrong and Edward finds himself in a more confused state than ever.
It does seem like a crazy storyline. A man with scissors for hands? Imagine trying to pitch that to a production company…
“Hey, I had this idea about a guy who was created by an inventor out of leather. But the inventor never finished him so he gave the Frankenstein-like character scissors to compensates for his lack of hands… He can’t pick anything up! And sometimes he accidentally hurts himself and others around him… Like a metaphor really… Yeah. So, we need twenty million dollars.”
Anyway! Burton did get it made, with the actors considered to play Edward Scissorhands including Tom Cruise and Michael Jackson. Thankfully, Burton decided to give the teen idol, Johnny Depp (Alice In Wonderland and Public Enemies), a chance to break his type-cast. Nobody could have played the awkward Edward character any better.
Speaking of casting, one of my favourite actresses, Dianne Wiest, (The Lost Boys and The Horse Whisperer) was the perfect choice to play Peg Boggs, the Avon lady and motherly figure to Edward. She is so sensitive and plays the part of a kind suburban house mum very well.
Caroline Thompson was the screenwriter and collaborated with Tim Burton to come up with the story originally. She has written the screenplays to the likes of The Secret Garden and Black Beauty. She is a genius! One of my idols, for sure.
The sets look like a model set because of all of the pastel colours and cookie-cutter, two dimensional looking houses, especially in contrast with the black, gothic castle that Edward Scissorhands hides out in. It is actually a spectacular set which is an exaggeration of suburbia’s claustrophobia, uniformity and lack of individualism or creativity, which is what Edward Scissorhands inadvertently changes when he is introduced to the neighbourhood.
It is a comedic view on the insanity of normalcy. An entertaining watch – unlike anything you have ever seen before. It is a typical Burton film so if you’re not a fan of his work usually, you may not enjoy the weirdness of Edward Scissorhands. However, the love interest between Edward and Kim (Winona Ryder) as well as the snowy Christmas scenes makes it a great festive movie (despite the somewhat sad ending which Tom Cruise disliked).
A great movie! A fantastical change to the ordinary chick-flicks that flood the market. This is a magical, feel-good fable with a twist that will be appreciated by the whole family.
Jodie’s rating: 7.5/10
I’m not overly convinced that either of these trailers give the best feel of what the movie is really like, but here they are…
Director: Tim Burton
Writer: John August (Screenplay), Daniel Wallace (Novel – Big Fish: A Novel of Mythical Proportions)
Released: 2003
Starring: Marion Cotillard, Helena Bonham-Carter, Billy Crudup, Albert Finney and Ewen McGregor
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I have mentioned this movie in quite a few other posts, relating it to Forrest Gump and The Curious Case of Benjamin Button because of their similar stories about an average man on his adventure through life.
Big Fish is directed by Tim Burton, so already you have probably got an idea of what the feel of this film is. A little bit quirky with gothic undertones, but don’t be fooled, this is not a cookie-cutter Burton film (although it does include the incredible Helena Bonham-Carter), this is an amazing tale about Edward Bloom’s (Albert Finney/Ewan McGregor) life.
The protagonist is a storyteller although he is known to exaggerate and embellish the story of his life with fantastical metaphors and unbelievable occurrences. Just like Forrest Gump, Edward is a Southern man who finds himself on a road of various adventures, finds love and goes to war.
But Big Fish is a more light hearted and fantastical version where you’re not quite sure what to believe to be true. Edward Bloom’s stories take up most of the film, but it also tells the story of his son, William Bloom (Billy Crudup).
He goes on a journey of his own, retracing his father’s footsteps to find out the real story behind all of Edward’s fabricated tales. The contrast between reality and fantasy makes the story more believable. The facts would have made uninteresting tales, whereas the elaborate stories are entertaining and unbelievable.
I love this piece of dialogue where William’s fiancé Josephine (Marion Cotillard) speaks to William Bloom about how he met is wife, Sandra (Jessica Lange/Alison Lohman). I love Bloom’s way of speaking!
Edward Bloom: Your mother-in-law was never supposed to marry me. She was engaged to somebody else.
Josephine: I never knew.
Edward Bloom: Will never told you? Probably just as well. He would have told it wrong, anyway. All the facts, none of the flavor.
Josephine: Oh. So this is a tall tale.
Edward Bloom: Well, it’s not a short one.
This clip should give you a good idea of the feel of the movie:
The music is fantastic in Big Fish. There is Elvis Presley, Buddy Holly and Pearl Jam as well as the compositions by the infamous Danny Elfman (who incidentally cannot read music!)
Fate, destiny, time, love and death. From real life giants and lion tamers to mermaids and witches, Big Fish is a fantasy/adventure/drama movie, but with a make-believe glaze over it.
It is a story of great imagination which you will want to watch over and over again and read further into the details. It’s entertaining but also pulls on the heart-strings.
Jodie’s rating: 9/10
Just noticed they have used the same piece of music from Tim Burton’s Edward Scissorhands… and another piece of music I recognise from Black Beauty in this trailer! All of these movies have the same composer though; Danny Elfman.
Have you heard of this Icelandic band before? Of Monsters and Men are an AMAZING indie/folk band. They have the coolest singer I have ever come across, her name is Nanna (@nannabh89) and she is an incredible musician.
But, although I love her style and her talent, I can’t forget the rest of the band who act like they are all family in interviews and are all equally as talented… Especially Ragnar, the other front man/singer… He’s awesome.
So ANYWAY! I picked out this song, Lakehouse, because it is my favourite. But you may have heard of their hit single “Little Talks” before or my second favourite song “Mountain Sound“. All found on their album My Head Is An Animal.
They are the kind of band who would be incredible live! Enjoy this Mumford-and-Sons-but-better kind of band!
So here is the amazing song “Lakehouse” – the imagery is so vivid. This is how I imagine Iceland to be like in song-form.
Jodie.
Director: Jon Favreau
Writer: David Berenbaum
Released: 2003
Starring: Zooey Deschanel and Will Ferrell
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‘Son of a nutcracker’! It’s almost Christmas.
Not only did Elf win the poll, but it is also appropriate as it is the festive season. This is a pretty funny Christmas comedy movie with many hilarious one-liners that have really stuck, even after all these years!
Will Ferrell does a great job playing “Buddy the Elf” – the human who was raised by Santa’s elves – who goes on a journey travelling through the seven levels of the candy cane forest, past the sea of swirly-twirly gumdrops, and then, walks through the Lincoln tunnel to discover New York. This is where he finds that he is, in fact, human not elf. Along the way he spreads Christmas cheer, falls in love and meets his biological father.
His child-like innocence makes him relatable to children and misunderstood by adults resulting in very awkward, but funny situations.
This is a fantastical story touching on all of the typical Christmas morals of honesty, family and priorities. Although it is essentially a children’s film (as many festive movies are), it is a very enjoyable movies for the older audiences too, especially since Will Ferrell is in it.
It includes my favourite Christmas song; Baby, It’s Cold Outside, sung by Zooey Deschanel and Will Farrell. The same song on the official soundtrack is by Zooey Deschanel and Leon Redbone which is a great version.
Don’t be a ‘cotton-headed ninnymuggins’, this will be an entertaining Christmas film for the whole family to watch. Although I am not a fan of Christmas movies in general, Elf is a pretty good one, if not storyline-wise, at least for the comedic value of Will Ferrell‘s character.
Jodie’s rating: 7/10
NZ Film Freak