The Butterfly Effect

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Directors: Eric Bress and J. Mackye Gruber
Writer: Eric Bress and J. Mackye Gruber
Released: January 2004
Featuring: Ashton Kutcher and Amy Smart

prisonkutcherSoooo creepy! But in an awesome way. I have never seen anything like this film before.

Of course I was weary about Ashton Kutcher being in a serious thriller, but he was fantastic! Like, seriously convincing.

The Butterfly Effect is where a seemingly innocuous act can have a domino effect and create chaos.

It has been said that something as small as the flutter of a butterfly‘s wing can ultimately cause a typhoon halfway around the world.

kutcherkidThis film plays on this theory where Ashton’s  character, Evan, has the ability or curse to travel back to predetermined points in his life. But every time he tries to make one thing better, something else goes terribly wrong. There are five main characters and if he saves one, one of the others experience a huge trauma in their life. He never wins.

Evan's father had the same abilities.
Evan’s father had the same abilities.

It is an amazing film, truly. I get so creeped out by it though. I think it is 60% because of the music used, it is perfect for the story. I love time travel and this is a very dark story of the possibilities behind the ability to do so.

A very intense, scary, worrying, cringe-worthy and incredibly delusional story of how something bad, no matter how small, can grow and shape somebody’s life. The powerlessness that Evan feels and the consequences that he has to live with is impacted on the viewer, for sure.

It is written so well! The twists and turns, the gaps and surprises. The ending is not easy to guess either.

Jodie’s rating: 8.5/10
It’s a pretty complicated storyline to explain in a 2min trailer, so, just know that it’s way cooler than this:

Walk the Line

walk-the-line-posterDirector: James Mangold
Writer: James Mangold and Gill Dennis
Released: November 2005
Featuring: Joaquin Phoenix and Reese Witherspoon

WalkTheLine_1I thoroughly enjoyed this biopic about one of the best country rock n roll singers of the sixties, Johnny Cash.

Joaquin Phoenix did an incredible job of becoming Johnny Cash. His natural intensity was perfect for the really heavy and dark life of Johnny Cash. I didn’t know much about Johnny Cash until I impulsively bought this movie. I had a few of his songs and enjoyed them, but assumed that he was just a country singer for geriatrics.

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Performing in Folsom Prison

It turns out that Johnny Cash’s life and the people he rubbed shoulders with is incredible. The stories he has are inspiring. I am not sticking up for everything that Johnny Cash did, but I have to say that it was so unfortunate that he was married with children just before he reached his dream of being a musician. He let that old life go, hurting his family, and continue on following his dreams and the new life that come with it.

A lot of ups and downs which can become exhausting to watch, however, that just proves how convincing the film was; it really put you in Cash’s shoes.

Joaquin Phoenix and Reece WitherspoonReese Witherspoon, having not enjoyed her performances for almost all of her movies, pleasantly surprised me in Walk The Line. She was very convincing as June Carter and I have a new found respect for her.

Joaquin and Reese both did their own vocals… I’m afraid that I enjoyed their vocal performances more that the original Johnny and June performances! I feel bad for saying that, but their sound is so upbeat and their voices are quite similar to Johnny and June’s. Very well done indeed!

I love the sixties – as I am sure you are aware – so seeing Elvis, Jerry Lee Lewis and a few of my other favourite rock n roll stars was awesome! The clothes, the atmosphere that was so convincingly authentic was beautiful.

Can you name all of the rock and roll stars?
Can you name all of the rock and roll stars?

A gorgeously filmed biopic with fantastic actors and characters.

Jodie’s rating: 7.5/10

L’accordéoniste – Edith Piaf

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La Fille de Joie Est Triste (L’accordéoniste)
“The Accordionist” (1940)

This is a beautiful song written and performed by Edith Piaf (Non, Je Ne Regrette RienInception and Tu es PartoutSaving Private Ryan). The chorus gives me chills.

It is about a prostitute who is married to an accordionist who will be going to war soon and will not return to her alive.

Her man will never come back.
Goodbye to beautiful dreams.
Her life is done for.

I interpret her story as though she has to forget her emotions while she’s working, but as soon as she leaves and watches her husband play the Java, she becomes overwhelmed with emotion.

She wants to weep, it’s physical
All of her being is tense
Her breath suspended
The music has wrung her out

This song may be derived from similar life experiences. Piaf was abandoned by her parents and lived with her grandmother who owned a brothel. The prostitutes raised her and took care of her. By the age of 17 she had a child who then died at the age of two. Edith was involved in three near fatal car crashes, resulting in alcoholism that contributed to her liver cancer that took her life.

Such an unfortunate life, contrasted by her huge fame during the 1930s to 60s is tragic. But has most certainly been channelled in her beautifully emotional songs.

Obviously this song is sung in French, but that does not take any of the emotion away at all! Before I knew what she was singing about, I could hear the desperation and longing in her voice.

STOP!
Stop the music.

A beautiful song.
Jodie.
The final chorus from 2.40 is chilling!

Water For Elephants

Water-for-Elephants-movie-poster

Director: Francis Lawrence
Writer: Richard LaGravenese. Based on Sara Guen’s novel of the same name
Released: April 2011
Starring: Reese Witherspoon, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz

I bought this DVD as a bit of a whim. After stumbling across the trailer on YouTube I thought that the look of the whole film resembled the circus scenes in Big Fish.water-for-elephants-movie

It is the story of the dark side of the circus during the early 1930s, with a forbidden love story between Jacob (Robert Pattinson) and Marlena (Reese Witherspoon) intertwined. Jacob runs away with the circus and poses as a certified vet to continue travelling with them, but discovers that there’s much more to performing that the magic the audience sees.

On the way, he experiences the control and under handed acts that go on in order to keep the circus from failing during the depression. Staff would go missing in the night if the boss and husband of Marlena, August (Christoph Waltz), was unable to pay.

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Beautiful animals and amazing stunts

The climax did have me holding my breath, but the over all story seemed somewhat watered down, with the lack of suspense throughout most of the heavier scenes.

Of course, my terrible habit is that I hype movies up before I’ve even seen them. I did think that Water For Elephants was going to be more dramatic and horrific, perhaps I would have been right if it was an R17 rating or something like that. But, it wasn’t a bad story by any stretch and it was an enjoyable romance drama – despite there being more romance that drama for my taste.

However, it was very well shot! The director, Francis Lawrence shows his talent for lighting in previous films including I Am Legend and has carried it through to Water For Elephants. I am excited to see how he portrays The Hunger Games sequels!

film_water_for_elephants_The acting was great for the most part! Christoph Waltz… Need I say more? He was amazing as usual, and one of the most compelling reasons to buy this movie, he was convincingly intense. Robert Pattinson was pretty decent too, possibly a little monotone..? Reese Witherspoon was AV-ER-AGE to say the least. Shallow acting.

A cool tale that explores the fantasy of running away with the circus.

Jodie’s Rating: 6.5/10

Burlesque

burlesqueDirector: Steven Antin
Writers: Susannah Grant. Screenplay by Steven Antin and Diablo Cody
Released: November 2010
Starring: Christina Aguilera, Cher, Eric Dane, Cam Gigandet, Kristen Bell, Julianne Hough, Alan Cumming, Peter Gallagher, Stanley Tucci, Dianna Agron

So, Burlesque is pretty much a lighter, chick flick version of Moulin Rouge. It is an upbeat, modern story with back to back songs that make you want to get up and dance.

Christina Aguilera is a singer who I admire for her talent, yet if I am honest, I do not enjoy her music.

Amazing costumes, with themes ranging from the classic 1940s to the 1960s.She does an amazing job during the scenes where she is performing on stage. However, for the most part her acting is much to be desired. Her squeaky voice gets a little on nerves considering she has such a deep, powerful singing voice.

The same goes for Cher, her acting was average… But so was her auto-tuned voice. I’m not convinced that she should really be classed as “a legend”…

I swear Life After Love is the only successful song of hers that I can think of.

But Stanley Tucci is one of my favourite actors – he is great in this movie as usual!

Burlesque-tucci

I don’t love the songs enough to buy the soundtrack. But there are a couple that are pretty catchy! Unfortunately, Christina Aguilera’s voice is so distinct that sometimes her improvisation during the songs can become irritating. Hence why I have never bought an album of hers.

burlesqueCA

Following a typical chick-flick structure, the ending is no surprise. Over used morals of “do what you love”, “just do it” and “don’t give up” drowns this movie. But it is a film that is not supposed to be much more than enjoyable.

Looking for a pick me up? I think this high-energy, fun film will do the trick!

(Moulin Rouge + Glee = Burlesque)
Jodie’s rating: 6/10

Midnight In Paris

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Director: Woody Allen
Writer: Woody Allen
Released: June 2011
Starring: Owen Wilson, Rachel McAdams, Marion Cotillard, Kathy Bates, Adrien Brody

When I first watched this film I was disappointed because I had hyped up the plot of Gil (Owen Wilson) travelling through different time eras of Paris. The artistic, fashionable, sophisticated and elaborate times of the 1920s, as well as the ceremonious, coming of age times of the 1890s. But after letting my great expectations subside, I really enjoyed the watch.

parisnightThe plot is about the Golden Age. That is, longing to live in a time before your own. For example, mine is the early 1960s. Rock and roll music and amazing fashion, with the huge liberal movement against war and for free will.

Paul: Nostalgia is denial – denial of the painful present… the name for this denial is golden age thinking – the erroneous notion that a different time period is better than the one one’s living in – it’s a flaw in the romantic imagination of those people who find it difficult to cope with the present.

However, Midnight In Paris attempts to shroud my Golden Age in contempt, trying to convince me that few are content with the current times and to get over it. It dampened my comfort of believing I would be happier in a different time, because the reality is – as Gil discovers – that you would simply find another time that you would believe to be better.

There is a lot of magic in this film, which I love. Gil goes through a wormhole of sorts, where at the strike of midnight every night a 1920s car picks him up and takes him to parties with his literary heroes. It’s a beautiful “what if” storyline that lives out everybody’s dream to travel through time to experience a life not meant for them.

I think that the decision for Gil to be transported to different era via transport appropriate for that time was perfect. It seems like a small, obvious detail, but I’m just glad that there was no CGI, special effects or sound effects to make the transition obvious.

midnight-in-paris-carload-of-literary-types

This magic does not last throughout the film, however. “The grass is always greener on the other side” is a phrase that has been converted into the moral of this story – the cold, harsh light of day is not welcoming.

Gil sees that the beauty of every era can still be inspiring without having the ability to experience it first hand. Which is disappointing since it seems that he is throwing away his idyllic time era of 1920s Paris for an average life in 2010 Paris. He could have continued to live his dream, but chose not to for no convincing reason.

MIDNIGHT IN PARIS marion

On the other hand, I loved how his heroes gave him advice and support, which ultimately builds his confidence to improve his life in the present.

Gil: Would you read it?
Ernest Hemingway: Your novel?
Gil: Yeah, it’s about 400 pages long, and I’m just looking for an opinion.
Ernest Hemingway: My opinion is I hate it.
Gil: Well you haven’t even read it yet.
Ernest Hemingway: If it’s bad, I’ll hate it because I hate bad writing, and if it’s good, I’ll be envious and hate all the more. You don’t want the opinion of another writer.

Instead of taking the easy option of staying in his dream, he takes the tough road of building his life into what he really wants. I guess he shook of the security blanket of living in the past – an easier place to live because you know what’s coming for you.

Gil: Adriana, if you stay here though, and this becomes your present then pretty soon you’ll start imagining another time was really your… You know, was really the golden time. Yeah, that’s what the present is. It’s a little unsatisfying because life’s a little unsatisfying.

 

Gertrude Stein: We all fear death and question our place in the universe. The artist’s job is not to succumb to despair, but to find an antidote for the emptiness of existence.

The beautiful French music was glorious! Seriously considering buying the soundtrack.

The acting was very well done. I really hated Rachel McAdam’s character. Like, it got to the point where I was starting to think that she must be a total bi-atch in real life because she played evil Inez so convincingly. So, kudos to her acting ability.

Owen Wilson was pretty much the same character he is in everything. I’m not totally sure why he was cast. Perhaps to keep the film upbeat.

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It is an uplifting tale of something that many of us dream of doing. The ending was rather disappointing, at first. But I have come to terms with it, and I think it works well for Gil.

Worth a watch, but don’t expect it to be a deep and meaningful movie – you will be disappointed! Look at it as a quirky drama/rom-com. Although, I do think that it would have been a very moving film if it was heavier with more drama and emotion.

Jodie’s rating: 8/10

My Favourite Character: Maggie Jacobs

MaggieThe ditsy character in the Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant TV series, Extras, is Maggie Jacobs (Ashley Jensen).

Would you rather be you, with your face and your legs, and the brain of a chimpanzee...Andy Millman: Brilliant.Maggie Jacobs: ...or would you rather be a chimpanzee, but with your brain?
“Would you rather be you, with your face and your legs, and the brain of a chimpanzee, or would you rather be a chimpanzee, but with your brain?”

I like her because she is so innocent and naive. It makes a huge change for one of the leading characters to be so honest and unaffected by mainstream beliefs. She is fresh-faced but average, similar to Bridget Jones but even easier to relate to.

I guess because she’s in a dead-end job, single and struggling as a extra on television shows, rubbing shoulders with fame and fortune yet never coming close to it, like how much of society feels as they slave away at work. But Maggie never strives for any of that. She just plods along.

I wouldn’t go as far as saying that I look up to her, but I do draw inspiration from her because she is so honest to people. Plus, she always does something to embarrass herself but lets it go – she never dwells on bad experiences or holds grudges.

She’s funny, loyal and doesn’t lie to anyone… Which gets her into trouble sometimes. Her Scottish accent is amazing, too!

Jodie.

Classic naive Maggie:

Easy A

easy_a_posterDirector: Will Gluck
Writer: Bert V. Royal
Released: September 2010
Starring: Emma Stone, Amanda Bynes, Lisa Kudrow, Stanley Tucci

This is quite a different version to the typical high school chick flick that drowns the market. Easy A is about how rumours can make or break your reputation. But also how you can take insults and use them to your advantage.

amanda-bynes-easy-aIt has a funny script with some catchy insults from the witty and very sarcastic Olive (Emma Stone) – similar dialogue to Juno.

Her best come backs are usually toward the “Jesus Freak”, Marianne (Amanda Bynes), who was responsible for spreading the false rumour of Olive losing her virginity.

Marianne: There’s a higher power that will judge you for your indecency.
Olive: Tom Cruise?

This movie covers everything that one would come across in high school; self expression, religious beliefs, hypocritical people, assumptions and rumour-spreaders. Of course, Olive uses all of this to her advantage.

She sassed up her wardrobe “just like they asked” and becomes her alter ego of the ‘whore’, despite being a very respectable 17-year-old. Just goes to show that what you may see on the outside is not always what is on the inside. And vice versa.

Emma StoneEASY A.

Nina: Perhaps you should embroider a red A on your wardrobe, you abominable tramp.
Olive: Perhaps you should get a wardrobe, you abominable twat.

on+car+with+rhiI really enjoyed this movie because it is a huge, gigantic middle finger to society. You can’t change what people think of you, but you can choose not to be a victim to it.

People rumoured that Olive was a bit of a “skank”, so she began to dress like one! They didn’t  whisper about it behind her back after she started wearing corsets and high heels to school, making the scandal-filled rumour less shocking.

It is a fun movie with references to eighties high school movies such as The Breakfast Club which I thought was really smart and made it a story that seemed more human because everybody wants to be in an eighties high school film.

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The music is pretty awesome, too. Jessie J’s Sexy Silk is a fun song, with a modernised version of We Go Together (from Grease) by I Heart Homework. But with my personal favourite being from The Breakfast Club called Don’t You (Forget About Me) originally by Simple Minds, but covered by AM.

Oh, and since watching Easy A, Natasha Bedingfield’s Pocket Full of Sunshine has not left my mind for the past few days. You should expect the same thing after watching the film.

Mr. Griffith: I don’t know what your generation’s fascination is with documenting your every thought… “Roman is having an OK day, and bought a Coke Zero at the gas station. Raise the roof.”
Olive: He got a Coke Zero AGAIN. Ah, that Roman. Incorrigible.

Easy A is a fun and easy watch. The script enables viewers to look into it as far as they wish with layered themes and slightly more complex characters than usual. Obviously not a film for everyone, but it’s definitely my favourite movie at the moment – up there with The Breakfast Club! A 2010 version of a 1985 chick flick.tumblr_mhbirb1bNm1s1wtnqo1_500

 

Actually, I would say that it is on par with Pitch Perfect.

Jodie’s rating: 7.5/10

Megamind

megamind poster

Directed: Tom McGrath
Written: Alan J. Schoolcraft and Brent Simons
Released: November 2010
Featuring: Will Ferrell, Tina Fey, Jonah Hill, David Cross and Brad Pitt

I think the best animations are ones where they are enjoyable for more than one age group, which Megamind certainly is! Great for the younger audience as well as teenagers and adults.

megamind
“Being bad was the only thing I was ever good at”

This movie is about a blue alien named Megamind (Will Ferrell) who was sent to  Earth as a baby, growing up to cause destruction and trouble. Megamind and his rival, Metro Man (Brad Pitt) who is the city’s ‘super hero’, frequently fight in Metro City like Superman and Lex Luthor. It’s a classic good guy/bad guy relationship, which becomes a game to Megamind, until he finally defeats Metro Man and realises that the success he had always strived for was not as rewarding as he had thought.

Moral: Be careful what you wish for; you may just get it.

This animation has some of the best lines in it, I reckon it’s up there with Juno‘s dialogue in some parts. The script is very well written, the dialogue as well as the storyline. It’s a classic superhero story which frequently mocks itself.

This type of animation is similar to that of Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs, but Megamind is a slightly more mature story; funnier and more entertaining.

Metroman2
I love you, Metro Man!
“And I love YOU, random citizen!”

Megamind: In case you’ve noticed, you’ve fallen right into my trap!
Metro Man: You can’t trap justice! It’s an idea, a BELIEF!
Megamind: Even the most heartfelt belief can get corroded over time!
Metro Man: Justice is a non-corrosive metal!
Megamind: But metals can be melted, by the heat of revanche!
Metro Man: It’s REVENGE, and it’s best served cold!
Megamind: But it can be easily reheated, in the microwave of evil!
Metro Man: Well, I think your warranty’s about to expire!
Megamind: Maybe I got an extended warranty!
Metro Man: Warranties are invalid, if used beyond their intended purpose!

All the characters are awesome! Roxanne Ritchie (Tina Fey) is a news reporter who always gets kidnapped by Megamind to provoke another fight with Metro Man. She has been taken so many times that nothing phases her any more.

Roxanne: Could someone stamp my frequent kidnapping card?
Megamind: You of all people know we discontinued that promotion.

Hal-Roxanne-
Hal: “You’re living a fantasy. There is no Easter Bunny. There is no Tooth Fairy. There is no Queen of England.”

Hal (Jonah Hill) is probably my favourite character though because he’s the funniest. He’s desperate for Roxanne’s attention but fails to be smooth or flattering. Megamind turned Hal into the new ‘good guy superhero’ after Metro Man’s disappearance, and named him Titan.

Hal: I’m havin’ a party at my house, gonna be off the hook, or whatever. You should come over. I got a DJ, rented a bouncy house, made a gallon of dip. It’s gonna be sick!
Roxanne: Oh, I…I don’t know, Hal. I don’t really feel like being around a bunch of people.
Hal: No, no, no! That’s the best part, it’ll just be like, you and me… I did hire a wedding photographer. That’s just in case we were like, something crazy happened and we wanted a picture of it like, maybe we should have this for like, ever. Like a memory, you know?
Roxanne: Um, I’m gonna pass. I have some work here that I need to do, anyway.
Hal: Cool. So, Thursday? Soft Thursday?

A fun, exciting and hilarious twist on the age-old superhero format. Great cast, characters and storyline.

Jodie’s rating: 7/10

The Breakfast Club

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Director: John Hughes
Writer: John Hughes
Released: February 1985
Featuring:Emilio Estevez, Molly Ringwald, Judd Nelson, Anthony Michael Hall, Ally Sheedy, Paul Gleason

Probably the best high school based film. Openly addressing and mocking their stereotypes and the pressures each one of them are under by their associated peers.

It is a very well made film because it is entirely based in one place during one day, with a tiny cast. We are sitting in on a Saturday detention with five completely contrasting students who soon find out what they hate and what they love about each other and themselves. Very human, very emotionally rooted.

The Characters:
The-Breakfast-ClubThe cheerleader type referred to as ‘the princess’ named Claire (Molly Ringwald).

The jock referred to as ‘sporto’ named Andrew (Emilio Estevez).

‘The brain’ named Brian (Anthony Michael Hall).

The kook or ‘the basket case’ named Allison (Ally Sheedy).

The messed up ‘criminal’ called John (Judd Nelson).

The Kook and the Princess
The Kook and The Princess

What is great about these characters, is that we can see qualities in ourselves in all of them. They are a mirror image of the teenage audience. We all know somebody with qualities like them, we all find some of them in ourselves and we all find characteristics in them that we want to possess.
Despite being about five typical stereotypes, by the end of the movie, you realise that they are a group of misfits who don’t want to belong to a group who tells them who to be.

FreezeframeI think if there was an extended version of this movie, it would be how each one of them over came the pressure of their groups and openly hung out with other cliques, because they’re all strong characters who would become role models. Well, that’s what I would like to think would happen anyway.

Made in the eighties and it certainly looks like the eighties! I swear I am transported to that era every time I watch it. Great eighties music too, including one of my favourite songs Don’t You (Forget About Me) by Simple Minds. If you want to listen to some eighties music on the go, this site has some great eighties music.

It’s true, high school really does suck. But this movie will make you feel better about it.

Jodie’s rating: 8/10
I would just like to say that they have excluded all of the funny bits in this trailer, so if you like the look of this, you’re going to love the film.

The Blair Witch Project

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Directors: Daniel Myrick and Eduardo Sánchez
Writers: Daniel Myrick and Eduardo Sánchez
Released: January 1999

I literally did not sleep last night.

I remember seeing snippets of this film when I was about 11, but I had not remembered how effective the horror aspect of it was! It is the best horror/psychological thriller I have seen in a very long time.

blairmissingThree film makers go missing in the woods while covering the legend of the Blair Witch that supposedly haunted the area. The film makers were never found again, but their footage was, which makes up this film.

Pretty simple plot line with amateur filming which is very convincing! The idea of this horror is that the less you see the more your imagination runs a riot. You never actually see any witch or any sort of witch craft or supernatural beings, but the sounds and supposed actions of the Blair Witch is more than enough to keep you on edge.

Reading a bit about the making of this film is quite interesting. 2000 actors auditioned and the three actors with the best improvisational skills got the parts. The actors got a very loose script to work with, and to get into to character the cast were taken hiking and camping in the woods, depriving them of food and harassing them at night by the crew.

blairwitchproThe acting is well done, with Heather being the main character as she uses the camera (and talks) the most. She is certainly an annoying character who is a total know it all, but apparently that was intentional – perhaps to keep the audience in a false sense of security as she seems convinced that at no point are they ever lost. The other two actors are fantastically convincing and natural too.

A scary story to say the least. The further toward the end it gets, the more terrifying it becomes. The final shot is still freaking me out. Considering this was all done with handy cams and mostly improvised, makes this film a more effective horror.

So awesome!!

Jodie’s rating: 8/10

Django Unchained

django-unchained-poster

Director: Quentin Tarantino
Writer: Quentin Tarantino
Released: December 2012/January 2013
Starring: Jamie Foxx, Christoph Waltz, Leonardo DiCaprio, Samuel L. Jackson

Django.
The D is silent.

Well, I got to say, the first quarter of the movie is incredible! Django (Jamie Foxx) being freed by a strange man named Dr. King Schultz (Christoph Waltz) and the show-down that occurred between Schultz and the Speck Brothers who were transporting Django and other slaves to a plantation. This is where Django and Schultz become a team and continue the journey as Bounty Hunters (killing criminals and selling their corpses for rewards).

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Dr. King Schultz: My good man, did you simply get carried away with your dramatic gesture, or are you pointing your weapon at me with lethal intention?
Ace Speck: [cocks shotgun] Last chance, fancy pants.

It was a fantastic start to another incredible Tarantino film… Or at least that’s what I thought… Let me tell you, the idea of “less is more” is not something that Tarantino agrees with.

Django-Unchained-fightsceneIt slowly (and boy do I mean slowly!) unravelled to reveal a story that consisted of long scenes of dialogue with very sudden outbursts of bloody gunfire that would last an eternity. Particularly the final fight.

Well you think it’s the final fight until another scene of dialogue and another fight follows. By the time it reaches the actual final gun fight, you’re so over the blood and gore that you’re immune to the tragedy of it all and the impact of the violent film has subsided.

If you’re worried that this film is going to be too sadistic… Don’t worry. It’s not. I’m not going to lie, I did flinch when a slave was ripped apart by dogs, and when a horse was shot in the head… But it is essentially a black comedy – it ain’t no Saw. It is seriously more comedic than violent, especially with the scene featuring Jonah Hill.

Django-Unchained-shultzChristoph Waltz was absolutely hilarious too. Actually, this guy is going to get a whole paragraph dedicated to his acting. He is totally incredible! Did you know that he can speak three languages fluently!? English, French and German, which he speaks in Inglourious Basterds and Django Unchained. His way of acting is unlike any other… you can’t even tell if he is acting or not because he is just so natural. *Sigh*. Maaaan… He needs a hi-5. His character had some wicked quotes too.

You silver-tongued devil, you.

Unfortunately, some things were unintentionally funny. Like Quentin Tarantino’s cameo… Yeah. That was… Weird. Especially since him and another character were speaking with an Australian accent. That literally came out of nowhere, so confusing! It was kind of disturbing.

django-unchainedhorseI have to make a quick point about the horses. They were SO well trained! Incredible stunt horses. Being a horserider myself, I tend to get really picky about how the horses or riders are doing something wrong, like if the horse-doubles look very little alike or how the actors can’t ride or how sometimes I notice that one of the riders is totally out of control of their horse.
But I couldn’t fault any of the horses or riders in this film! Particularly Jamie Foxx when he was riding a horse with no bridle or saddle… Actually that was yet another left-field occurrence. It was kind of pointless, unexpected and weird.

Django-Unchained-28I had read somewhere before seeing Django Unchained that there is a part where Leonardo accidentally slams his hand down onto a wine glass while in character. I looked out for it, and it makes the scene a hundred times better because for a split second you see the shock on his face, but he carries on. Throughout the scene he picks glass out of his hand, even smearing his own blood over another actor’s face. Awesomely grotesque, I have got to say! Good on you, DiCaprio. He played an mildly insane and overpowering man very well!

Gentlemen, you had my curiosity, now you have my attention.

The music was pretty cool. My favourite song was one called Freedom by Anthony Hamilton and Elayna Boynton. But out of nowhere a hardcore rap song blared against while a group of horses and riders walked from one end of the screen to the other… The mood of the movie was sort of ruined by odd little choices like that.

It wasn’t as sadistic or gory as I was expecting it to be. Also, the story line did not involve as many personal details about many characters, like there was in Inglourious Basterds. It made the entire movie seem distant, making it difficult to lose yourself in the movie.

I reckon Quentin Tarantino was just having fun in this movie. I reckon it would have been much more entertaining being on set every day rather than sitting through a Lord of the Rings-length Western/Black Comedy/Romance/Action movie.

Still confused by what I just watched…

Jodie’s rating: 6/10
You need to watch this trailer to listen purely to Christoph’s voice! His use of inflection is perfection!

The reasons why the world didn’t end on 21-12-12

lets get drunk

As you may have noticed, the world is not at its end. You may be pondering why this may have not occurred. Here are some of my suggestions…

tv DOCTOR WHO1. After time travelling back to the beginning of the Mayan calendar, Doctor Who attempted to speak to the Mayan elders to extend the end of the calendar to a much further date in time. He was unsuccessful and was accused of being a witch doctor. He tried to explain that he wasn’t a Doctor Which, but a Doctor Who. After convincing them to not treat him as a threat, he was able to compromise, and settled on an agreement. That at the end of the Mayan calendar a “to be cont.” sign was to be etched at the end. Scientists, if they were to re-study the Mayan calendar today, will find this statement, thanks to the Doctor.

Superhero2. A huge meteor was hurtling toward Earth, NASA people were freaking out (despite the many press releases stating otherwise). They called the man that is never to be spoken about publicly. His name, is Superman. Fiction? I think not! Unfortunately, the meteor was purposely laced with kryptonite by the alien beings who wanted to ruin Superman’s world. He was unable to stop the meteor in it’s path, so Iron Man, although a little drunk from his house party celebrating his updated Iron Man suit, was able to use his brain, his mind and his head too, making it possible with the use of various lasers and alcohol-induced decisions to divert the meteor. Phewph!

The world didn't end

Fail3. Having heard about the Mayans’ little plan about ending the Earth in 2012, Vianne, a girl who lived around the time of the invention of the Mayan calendar, decided that she had to do something. She was never welcome in the Mayan society because of her super powers that were shunned by the elders who never acknowledged her existence (which is why she can not be found in any Mayan history).

Vianne climbed up to the tallest tree on the tallest mountain and leapt! She flew higher and higher, through the clouds and out into space. She then flew around the earth millions of times a second like a string being wound up into a ball. She was able to fly so fast that the atmosphere began to be disturbed and a protective film or layer was created.

grumpy cat cakeA layer that we now call an ozone that protected Earth from the meteorite that was supposed to impoverish the Earth in December of 2012. Our ozone layer protects us against many things that would have damaged the world in Mayan times due to the world’s lack of ozone.

cheer-up-not-the-end-of-the-world-mayan-bar-comic4. Ever heard of the butterfly effect? Where the tiniest of changes made by the likes of a time traveller, perhaps the indiscriminate killing of a minuscule insect could change the future forever through a domino effect. Well, in fact, what actually happened to prevent the world from being wiped from existence in 2012 was a time traveller who travelled from the year 1750AD, back in time to the year 3114 BC.

Stepping out of his time machine that looked like a bowling ball, the time traveller realised that he forgot to install a hand break, and even worse than that, he had landed on a hill. Just as he opened the door, the time machine began to roll at an alarming rate toward a river.

engineering-fail-116Airborne, the machine continued falling down the gully and landed on the fast flowing river, landing with an unsatisfying splash like a ping-pong ball thrown into a swimming pool.  Now, I know what you’re thinking, you think I’m going to say that on the way down the hill the time machine squished something that had major repercussions on the distant future…

Although during it’s time travelling voyage, it’s technological outputs misguided many migrating Monarch butterflies. The Monarch butterflies used to migrate annually to southern Mexico from Canada for the fall, however, since the day that their migrating instincts were interfered with, they now fly to central Mexico, which is their annual habit even today…

Round calendarBut apart from that, in fact what happened was that as the spheric time machine rolled down the hill that was classed as “sacred” by the local native Mayan people of Southern Mexico. This was witnessed by a Mayan woman who had been put in charge of creating the Mayan Calendar. She had a rock canvas that was a rectangular shape and had begun carving the dates when suddenly a giant ball-like rock thing appeared in the distance and rolled down the sacred hill at an ever increasing speed, demolishing trees on the way.

Mesmerised by this sight, she realised that a rectangular canvas would not be inspirational or aesthetically pleasing enough, and a round rock would be required. Unfortunately, a round rock could not accommodate nearly as many dates, hence why she ran out of room by the time she got to the year 2012 rather that the previous date of 20012. Oops!

Thanks 9gag.com

Let me know what your reasons are for the lack of a 2012 apocalypse.

Jodie.

Dream – Priscilla Ahn

priscilla-ahn

This song is a lovely soothing tune that is relaxing and thought-provoking.

I had never heard of Priscilla Ahn until I stumbled across her in the “Narnia parts” of YouTube. I love her name, her voice and sound – especially the harmonizing.

Dream is a wonderful song. Although I can’t really relate to the religious references, I can definitely appreciate the song about life and moving on.

If you enjoy Ahn’s song, you may enjoy her more upbeat and feel-good song called “When You Grow Up“.


Jodie.

The Down Home Shake Down! – Big Mama Thornton

Big Mama Thornton and the gang… I’m in love.

I AM ABOUT TO LIBERATE YOU WITH THE SOUND OF MUSIC!

Holy crapolahs peoples! Big Mama is back!! It’s got harmonicas, a beat and a strummin’ bass and it makes you want to get moving. The flat-footing days of the south have been preserved for our era… And I’m loving it!

I tell you what, if I could go back in time, I would go back to the days of this kind of music! So freakin’ awesome.

I love this Down Home Shake Down because of Big Mama’s voice in the background – it makes chills go down your spine.

If you want to feel like dancing, I strongly shove you in the direction to watch this:

You don’t have to thank me. Thank the Mama, Dr. Ross, Shakey Horton, John Lee Hooker and the other AMAZING musicians of this genre and time for making incredible, outstanding  and really, really cool music.
Jodie.

Charlie Chaplin – The Greatest Speech

Charlie Chaplin
Charlie Chaplin – 1940

By Charlie Chaplin in 1940, I bring you the greatest speech ever given.
A speech that was ahead of its time, yet delivers important messages of peace, support and kindness from mankind, to mankind that applies today more than ever.

I’m sorry but I don’t want to be an Emperor, that’s not my business. I don’t want to rule or conquer anyone. I should like to help everyone if possible, Jew, gentile, black man, white.

We all want to help one another, human beings are like that. We all want to live by each other’s happiness, not by each other’s misery. We don’t want to hate and despise one another. In this world there is room for everyone and the earth is rich and can provide for everyone.

The way of life can be free and beautiful. But we have lost the way.

Greed has poisoned men’s souls, has barricaded the world with hate;
has goose-stepped us into misery and bloodshed.

We have developed speed but we have shut ourselves in:
machinery that gives abundance has left us in want.
Our knowledge has made us cynical,
our cleverness hard and unkind.
We think too much and feel too little:
More than machinery we need humanity;
More than cleverness we need kindness and gentleness.

Without these qualities, life will be violent and all will be lost.

The aeroplane and the radio have brought us closer together. The very nature of these inventions cries out for the goodness in men, cries out for universal brotherhood for the unity of us all.

Even now my voice is reaching millions throughout the world, millions of despairing men, women and little children, victims of a system that makes men torture and imprison innocent people. To those who can hear me I say “Do not despair”.

The misery that is now upon us is but the passing of greed, the bitterness of men who fear the way of human progress: the hate of men will pass and dictators die and the power they took from the people, will return to the people and so long as men die [now] liberty will never perish. . .

Soldiers: don’t give yourselves to brutes, men who despise you and enslave you, who regiment your lives, tell you what to do, what to think and what to feel, who drill you, diet you, treat you as cattle, as cannon fodder.

Don’t give yourselves to these unnatural men, machine men, with machine minds and machine hearts. You are not machines. You are not cattle. You are men. You have the love of humanity in your hearts. You don’t hate, only the unloved hate. Only the unloved and the unnatural. Soldiers: don’t fight for slavery, fight for liberty.

In the seventeenth chapter of Saint Luke it is written:
“The kingdom of God is within man”
Not one man, nor a group of men, but in all men; in you, the people.

You the people have the power, the power to create machines, the power to create happiness. You the people have the power to make life free and beautiful, to make this life a wonderful adventure. Then in the name of democracy let’s use that power, let us all unite.

Let us fight for a new world, a decent world that will give men a chance to work, that will give you the future and old age and security. By the promise of these things, brutes have risen to power, but they lie. They do not fulfil their promise, they never will. Dictators free themselves but they enslave the people. Now let us fight to fulfil that promise.

Let us fight to free the world, to do away with national barriers, do away with greed, with hate and intolerance. Let us fight for a world of reason, a world where science and progress will lead to all men’s happiness.

Soldiers! In the name of democracy, let us all unite!

– Charlie Chaplin

Jodie.